CAROLYN
BEITZEL
Diary #18
We
Need Relief!
As faculty we were asked that from 8:3010:00 a.m. we "limit" the amount of students moving in the hallways. I always thought that limit meant to do less of what you did before. So when kids were asking to go to the bathroom and the girls were exclaiming "but it's an emergency!!" I gave them the okay and then "Please don't dawdle. Go there and get back."
Any other permission was denied and I explained that for this morning we would be "limiting" the use of the hall pass. I felt that I had met our administration's request.
The state security people evidently felt differently.My classroom is located directly in the middle of the eighth grade hallway. Mr. Rendell was ensconced in the school library at the end of the hallway from my classroom. Security was posted at either end of the hallway and in front of the library doors. No one was getting in.
What could be the harm of a 13-year-old using the restrooms, you might ask. Better not. The second girl came back in the room fairly quickly and said, "The security guard said we were not to leave our rooms." I was taken aback. Were we in lockdown and not informed?
Political values
After the governor had left our building (without walking around or visiting with anyone else), many teachers met in the faculty room for lunch. The talk was of how we all felt put upon and discarded.
Now, of course I realize that he is an important man, and he did have another place to be (a famous African American Philadelphian had passed away and he was attending the funeral) for which he was already late. And to give him credit, we did hear today in our monthly faculty meeting that the security people had positioned themselves in front of classrooms not to keep us in, but to keep HIM from dropping by to say hello. He is a very personable man. I have shaken his hand on many public occasions when he was Philadelphia's mayor, so I am trying to not take too great offense.
However, if he was visiting a school for the purpose of meeting with people, he didn't get the real picture of what we were all about. I think that is the real issue we all had. And it was just one more example of how we feel the administration does not value us.Well, today I wondered if maybe we were wrong. Or were we?
The superintendent drops by
Today we had a visit from our superintendent. He wanted us to know that he values what we do everyday. He thinks we are "heroes and missionaries." We are not, in fact, a "failing school," as local papers said a few weeks back when our poor test scores were reported.
Our superintendent told us that he is doing everything he can to get us some relief. He works day and night to find solutions to our problems. His "bags are packed for us," meaning that at a moment's notice he would do all in his power to help.
We've heard that before. He is certainly a motivational kind of guy. And I do admire him for his take-charge attitude. He says he is trying hard to get about 250 kids out of our school to lessen our overcrowding. I will applaud him when he does. In the meantime, some days I am fearful to come out of my room when the eighth graders are dismissed for lunch and the stampede begins.They are unruly, undisciplined and lacking in manners. They race through the halls, regardless of how many other kids are in their way. After the halls have cleared, there comes a group of boys, about eight or nine in all. They begin their lunchroom stroll from one side of the quad hallway and walk the entire circumference before heading down the stairs. They walk in two lines and stretch themselves out from wall to wall. They are loud and in a pack, and they seem quite menacing.
I have asked them on more than one occasion to "Get to lunch, you guys are late" or "Is it necessary to be so loud when you walk to lunch?" What I get in return is looks that could kill and complete silence, as if I don't exist and am certainly not worth their time as they walk on by.
What we need from our superintendent is real action. We are too big and we need more help. We need more security (we have three for a total of 1670 students), and they need to be more visible in the hallways. We need textbooks for each of our students in our classrooms (I share mine with another class of social studies students). We need more reading specialists for the enormous student population that reads and comprehends below grade level.
We need an alternative school for all the students who continue on a daily basis to disrupt the learning of others. We need to suspend more students for failing to abide by the district's No Tolerance policy for bullying. We need in- school suspension for all students (not just sixth grade). We need more parent volunteers to take the administrative load off teachers who spend too much time writing referrals for uniform violations.
"Breathe," as my daughter frequently tells me when I get going on a cause close to my heart.Not a good day
It's a hard job where I work. The students often don't seem to care about their jobs as learners. Their academic levels are so low that I feel like I am placing a band-aid on a major arterial bleed — that no matter what I do it just will not get any better and they will perish. If not today then surely later.
But I go in every day. Gladly. I plan awesome lessons. I encourage thinking and discussion. I utilize technology to enhance their experience. I broaden their horizons by taking them places they would never go on their own. I do it, day in and day out, without complaint (ask my husband) because I care for them. I really want them to learn from me that they can be successful.
Today was not a good day. Many negative events occurred, but the day is done. Tomorrow will be a new day with new opportunities. I have walked in many shoes but this pair is the hardest to break in even though I know they fit perfectly.
I hope Governor Rendell saw our potential and gives us relief. I have to believe our superintendent is doing better than his best. I have seen the building administration change this year for the better. I am becoming a more resilient person (I have never picked myself up more often in my entire life!). In the big picture this all must count for something. I am just not sure what it is. Not today.
